JIM DORAN

Make your own Monsters

sorting

Some years ago, I wrote about how to “Make your own Action Figures.” When I was a boy, I used to melt various plastic figures into new, fantastic creatures. In a celebration of the last Sunday of August, Leezle and I created prototypes of new monsters using dinosaurs from the dollar isle at Target.

melting

First, we dissected the figures using X-acto blades. Then, we attempted to melt/fuse the parts together with a magnifying glass and the sun. It was late afternoon, and we didn’t have much success (although we did let the smoke out of a couple of leaves and twigs).

us

We ended up using a mini-butane torch, which worked really well.

Hydra

moew

moeww

I must say the following: ANY KIDS READING THIS – DO NOT DO THIS WITHOUT ADULT SUPERVISION. MAKE ALL FIGURES IN A WELL VENTILATED AREA. The plastic is really smelly and bad for you. And the butane flame is not good for general health, either.

Luckily, I had Leezle to supervise me.

piles

More to follow.

Make Your Own Action Figures

When I was a kid, I spent a lot of time wishing I had a long skinny monkey tail like the Pink Panther.  I  imagined how I’d use it to help perform everyday tasks.   I still think it would be useful, although I’d opt in for a pointy devil tail these days, which is good for spearing circus peanuts.

When I was a kid, I got in really bad trouble for playing with matches.  I had a lot of army men, which I thought were kind of boring. I decided they needed to undergo genetic anthropomorphic mutation to become more interesting/useful. So, in my basement laboratory, with my assistant little-boy-from-next-door, I set out to create better toys. The trouble was, little-boy-from-next-door burned himself with a match, which brought a world of parent trouble down on me and my genetic anthropomorphic mutation toy laboratory. If I’d had a tail, I wouldn’t have needed an assistant in the first place and wouldn’t have lost my laboratory.

Some of my creations were awesome – a three armed ax wielding warrior with no head, a two headed cowboy, a barrel chested headless monster…etc.

Being an adult is awesome because I don’t have to worry about parents shutting down my lab.  I only have to worry about the fumes from melting plastic. NOTE: KIDS – DO NOT DO THIS WITHOUT PARENTAL SUPERVISION.

I’ll be back – there’s some pretty interesting action happening in the backyard right now.